Tashkent

I’m jumping right into the tea. The real misadventure here is 1) self connecting in Dubai, and 2) taking Uzbekistan Airways to Tashkent. We had to stamp into Dubai at Terminal 3, collect our luggage, pay AED6 to take 1 stop on the metro to Terminal 1, recheck-in our luggage, get our Uzbekistan Airways boarding pass, and stamp back out of Dubai. Before we even got on the plane, some Uzbek gopniks thought our hands were looking too empty so they asked us to help carry one of their duty free bags full of *stuff* through security because they were overweight in their carry ons. No way Jose. When we got on the plane, the gopniks (who now number in the tens) slowly trickled in because they were busy gaslighting the ground staff that their bags were actually not overweight. Then they were standing everywhere -in the aisle, in other people’s seats-, exchanging whatever it is in their overfilled bags with each other, constantly taking things up and down from the overhead cabin, laughing and shouting like the plane was a bazaar. For once, the babushkas weren’t the ones getting on my nerves.

Oh I’m not done yet. The only air steward(ess) I saw before we took off was a guy who came and closed all the overhead cabins. There was not a single pre-take off cabin check done. The gopniks at this point had their seats (which weren’t even their assigned seats) fully reclined, else they were sprawled over an entire row, sleeping. Window shades were completely drawn down, electronic devices were charging, so what do you think the seat belt situation was. I kid you not, one guy was lying asleep across a whole row, all through take off, landing, and when we were disembarking the plane. The air stewardess woke him up TWICE in preparation for landing, he ignored them both.

I’m still not done yet. Within 20 seconds -this is not an exaggeration, I actually timed it- of landing, everyone stood up and collected their bags from above while the plane was still taxiing. They remained standing throughout the taxi. How, howww this airline is allowed to fly to the EU, I cannot understand. If Air Astana can manage the rowdiness, so can you, Uzbekistan Airways.

So that was our welcome to Uzbekistan. Pros- the food portion was huge, they have one James Bond movie on their entertainment system, their flight safety video was very cool, and they printed nice boarding passes. Con- I lost my sanity.

There was a lot more that happened, but I’ll get on with this post, which is supposed to be about Tashkent, capital of Uzbekistan. In short, I think Tashkent’s best attraction is its metro system. There’s a common thread across the country where museums don’t do justice to whatever history they are trying to preserve and showcase. The best museum in Tashkent, the State Museum of the Timurids, was a little lacking, in my opinion, despite me already having some historical context on the Timurids.

Back to the metro. It was built in the Soviet era, and is the most impressive metro in the ex Soviet Union I have yet to see (although admittedly I’ve only been to the ones in Almaty, Tbilisi, and Yerevan). Tickets are a flat fee of 2000 soms (20 cents). So if you don’t get out, you can ride the entire metro system which has 4 lines for just 20 cents. That’s what I kind of did, but I got out at Chorsu to see the bazaar. So effectively I spent 40 cents riding the metro and alighting at the top 13 most beautiful stations to take pictures. This took up pretty much my whole morning; take a look-

Kosmonavtlar

Alisher Navoi

Gofur Gulom

Tinchlik

Beruniy

Chorsu

Pakhtakor

Mustakillik Maydoni

Amir Temur Khiyoboni

Yunus Rajabiy

Abdulla Kodiriy

Bodomzor

Fun fact: it was only in 2018 when photography in the stations was made legal, because they were considered military installation due to their secondary role as a nuclear bomb shelter.

Other stuff to do: if you’re a normal tourist, you can just take a photo of Hotel Uzbekistan from the outside. It’s one of the largest hotels in the country and is a prominent landmark of Soviet brutalist architecture. If you’ve too many soms to spare, you could stay a night in it. It costed twice as much as my second most expensive accommodation in Uzbekistan and ranks as among the worst. But I did it in the name of history.

The biggest plov cauldron in the world had no plov in it by the time I visited because it was late, what a shame. Still think Besh Qozon is worthy a visit; the most pungent plov I had in Uzbekistan was here on my first night. Yes there was horse meat in it.

Next stop, Samarkand.

Hi! I am Joey, a University student from Singapore, attempting to show my appreciation for the world’s most powerful passport by literally milking its visa-free benefits one country at a time. I describe my travel budget as shoestring and travel style as audacious.